While this may sound melodramatic, we can all agree that it’s always a wise idea to perform a thorough background check on a potential romantic partner before you start dating them. We know that when we decide to apply for a new job, our background is checked. We also check or expect someone else to check whoever we entrust with custody of our children. So why isn’t it common to do a background verification before marriage? While background checks have always been expensive and time-consuming, nowadays they can be ordered at a moment’s notice, and there are dozens of reputable companies to choose from, such as Brevard Background Check. Whether or not you choose to inform your future spouse about the check, the process is quick and painless. But, it’s always best to discuss your past with your partner before considering tying the knot. Let’s check out why a background check is important!
So Why Should You Get a Background Check Before the Big Day?
You love and trust this person, so why bother with a background check? There are numerous reasons that prove it’s a smart idea and there are even many couples who decide to do it together before marriage.
- Ensuring There Are No Surprises in Either of Your Backgrounds: Your potential spouse may have forgotten about that broken lease right after college, or you might not have realized that you never paid off a store card that now leaves a black mark on your credit. Mistakes also happen on background reports. Finding and addressing those allows both partners to confidently move forward that nothing from your past can damage their future.
- Finances: Getting married means pooling both your resources and debts, and you need to know your partner’s financial history because it will have a significant impact on your financial future. If they have a poor, bankruptcies, evictions, or credit rating on their credit history, it will affect your financial future together. Future joint purchases will be affected by your credit scores, so it is only fair that you are both aware of what financial baggage the other is bringing into the relationship. If your partner has been open about their financial mistakes in the past, then you still need a background check to know precisely how bad things are and how to plan accordingly. If you, or your partner, have poor credit, you need to research the best way to proceed. Are you thinking about keeping everything in the name of the partner with good credit? This move might help save on interest payments, but it will take the other partner longer to re-establish their credit.
Though most background checks before the wedding should not reveal anything shocking, some things should be considered red flags. Those include:
- A Criminal History that They Kept Secret: A past criminal record is a definite red flag unless it was a misdemeanour charge where they were cleared. Something small may have slipped their mind or never seemed important enough to bring up. However, if there are arrests, charges, or prosecution for severe or violent crimes and your partner has kept that from you, it is probably a deal-breaker for marriage.
- An Identity Change: Unless your partner has been upfront about their reasons for changing their identity, you have to assume some treacherous reason to hide their past.
- Addictive Behaviour: Again, that’s one of those things that depends on whether your partner was honest upfront. Now, if all they told you was that they “used to drink a lot,” but you find evidence of a sordid past of addictive behaviours, you should be concerned. They may still be in denial about the seriousness of their addiction. A history full of possible narcotics convictions, patterns of erratic behaviour, and DUIs (Driving under the influence) should be a definite red flag.
- Previous Marriages: If your potential spouse was married before you but didn’t tell you, you should seriously weigh why they would keep such an important matter a secret from you.
In most cases where a background check is done before saying “I do”, both partners agree and participate. If your potential spouse refuses, becomes furious, or you feel uncomfortable even suggesting it, you may want to ask yourself why are you even tying the knot with this person? A marriage will only survive if built on trust, and trust starts with being completely honest about your past.